Our Story
homegrown & (mostly) held together
We’re Rachel and Nick Martin, and along with our three toddlers, we run The Barely Functioning Farm on our homestead in Blanco, TX. The name is honest advertising — between the animals, the kids, and everything in between, “barely functioning” describes most days pretty well. But everything we raise here is done right, even when it’s chaotic.
We believe in raising animals well, wasting nothing, and being upfront about what homesteading actually looks like — not the polished version, the real one.
The Homestead
Our main focus is meat rabbits, chickens, quail, and herbs and specialty plants — that’s where our energy goes, and what you’ll find in What We Offer.
But the rest of the crew rounds out the picture of who we are. We’ve also got ducks, horses, and donkeys, a mini cow and her baby, our blind goat Helen and her seeing-eye buddy Sullivan, our livestock guardian dog Philly, and Golden Retrievers we raise and breed through Yellow Rose Goldens. It’s a full house — and every animal here has a purpose, even if it’s just the serotonin boost from being unreasonably cute.
The Barely Functioning Farm 